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  • Writer's pictureBillie Proffitt

"You Can Find Me in St. Louie..."

…Where the gun play ring all day… Some got jobs & some sell yay, others just smoke & fuck all day…

I have spent one night in St. Louis, Missouri – & it happened to be the first Ferguson Riots.

I have this theory that however something begins is the foreshadowing of its existence, which my friendship with Dr. Domeny provides proof of every time we interact. I was in the middle of a soul-searching road-trip with little interaction – more importantly, nor belief in – fear-mongering American “news” as I rolled into the city to find a hotel room for the night. After taking the sold-out concierge’s suggestion of a different hotel in the Central West End area, making friends with both a waitress at the Drunken Fish & a bartender at Gamlin’s Whiskey House, I was somehow invited into a wine bar on my walk to (what I thought was going to be) bed. It was here that I met Dr. Domeny & his friends, including a girl who unknowingly brought me into their discussion.

The group was in righteous agreement with one another’s beliefs about the riots happening less than 10 miles from us – that the poor were victims, & if someone disagreed with their liberal views, then the aim was set to make that person feel a heartless bastard. I was not only clueless to these events, which by this time were now a nation-wide subject, but I definitely didn’t realize my whereabouts had placed me just down the road from them, (thank god my Mommy didn’t know where I was)… The only thing I did know, however, was that no matter where I am, or what’s going on, my personal values remain painfully sharp – as sharp, in fact, as my tongue.

“This is why I believe in incentivized birth control, & incentivized abortion,” I calmly stated to the unreceptive group - which was not exactly well-received. Turns out the Doctor’s friend-who-was-a-girl had a child before 20 & was not open to the idea that abortion was ever an option.

“How dare you!” she squealed. “It isn’t their fault!”

“Well, it was sure someone’s fault - accountability exists whether it’s fair or not,” I calmly, confidently - & drunkenly - sipped my Malbec, unaffected by her convictions. Dr. Domeny now walked a tightrope between 2 very real desires: defend his long-standing loyalty with his friend (& seemingly his own core beliefs)… Or try to fuck me for the night.

So once again in life this scenario played out in front of me, which head will win - or is it, which heart?

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